so things are great. no longer depressed got to see brian sat night it was sooo nice to see him i missed him sooooo much. and i feel sooo much beter than i have for the past 2 weeks. i just hope everything will work out for brian and i and we dont fight anymore. man oh man i got to sneeze ahhhhh lol
so iv been depressed and have had my feelings hurt for 2 weeks now. it sucks but right now i got to talk to brian i got to work things out between us and i think the best way to do that is in person where feelings can be ssen. not on the net or phone. i hope he doesnt like completely hate me : (
the little things i do for him and in hope he nocties and apperciates them but does her?
when i actually wear make up and straighten my hair in hope to get "you look beautiful" from him does he even notice?
the short sweet voicemails i leave him while he is at work. does he apperciate that i take time out of school just to call him and leave a voicemail
the tons of little "i miss you" or "im sorry" signs i make during class just in hope it will make him smile
when i go out somewhere o think of him and get him somthin like the lil dog does he even apperciate the fact i was thinkin bout him to get him somthin?
or the necklace i got him for his b-day did he really like it?
when i dress up nice and try my best to look as good as i can to just in hope impress him or get a "your beautiful" out of him does he even notice?
i kicked a guy int he head today haha why u may be asking well here is why......
he had ahold of my arms and was bout to break my brian bracelet and some other ones and it old him to let go and he woulndt and i told him to let go like 5 times and he didnt let go so i kicked him iin the head' maybe next time he will learn to let go of me when i tell him too wat u think?
it soo sad to see someone that u grew up watchin on tv pass away. geeze it sucks that eddie passed away. i watched the tribute to him on wwe and i started crying lol. ya i know but still iv been watchin him perform for a long time now. things have been good. i passed the social studies taks but not the math and science grrrness. oh well! right? ill get it eventually. well this sunday is the last day of ren fest woohoo. me and brian are gin cant wait. i have our entire day planned out hehe. just called him by the way no answer .. ::sigh:: he is prob playin that game hopefully he calls me or somthin.. i miss him. well i guess im goin o go.. oh ya guess what?
22 days until i start driving woohoo! tays talk to u guys later.
iv come to realize im not a very strong person im weak and i only show that im weak when im alone and no one can see. i just let all my emotions out. and its not very good. im under soo much stress. im goin crazy. i hate feeling like this. i hate that he isnt mine. i hate people that accuse me of cheating when i worked hard for my grades cause i wanna pass. and i hate people call me a liar just beccause i tell the truth cause id ont want to see a friend of my hurt. its not kool. i hate that i get judged for the way i dress. i mean comeone its just clothes. life just really sucks at this point in time and im hating it. ::sigh:: im goin to go. hope u guys have a god weeekend.
so its been a while since iv updated. haha nothin really has happen except haning out with brian<3. its funny how u can try and be nice to someone and there just CUNT about it. why eve try right?see if im nice again geeeze. schoool is goin very well.finished my reding class started a new class today woohoo!i got a call the other day from some gurls and some guys threating to beat the shit out of brian and i and they knew both my numbers and where i lived. but did they show NO! cause they were just all talk. haha! but ya it was quite funny. i think i know who it is actually but ya thats stays with me. well im goin to go.
so my doggy diablo keeps breakin out of the fence lol stupid dog like right now we are trying to keep him in the yard. y-day was kool besides megan trying to fuck up my life some more. my brian is such a sweetheart hehe i miss him oh sooo much and i cant wait to talk to him hell i cant wait to see hinm this weekend. well im gonna go and help watch diablo peace!
HAPPY B-DAY BRIAN! its my hunni's b-day today hehe i miss him bunchies and i hope he had a good b-day. i just talked to him and im sooo happy. and im not friends with megan anymore but who cars. KATIE I LUV U HEHE things are better now
wat am i suppose to do my supose to be friend megan is like tlakin to my guy behind my back and wanting to piss me off by doin it. im tired of her always doin this to me. no matter wat she does this to me with every guy. she makes me sooo mad. i thought she was my friend. but ya. miss u katie i ahvent gotten a comment from u in a long time . talk to u guys later.
<3kristi
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so i hung out with brian y-day hehe all ic an say is my day was AMAZING! hehe ta ta for now
so liek veeryone went to opeth last night but me even brian.. well brian called me around 4:30 talked for like 2 mins to me then said he would call me when he got hom but did he know and he didnt even reply to my myspace message i sent it which it showed he had read. god damn im pisssed arg. w/e lets see if we still ahng out on sunday. or if he even attempts to talk to me today. talk to u guys later byes
so im at school in 7th bored out of my mind. im done with all my work. im oh sooo hungry and i miss brian soooo freakin much. hehe i hope i get to see him this weekend. stupid johannas told him he has to have band practise on sat all day. and it sucks cause i really need to see rbain this weekend cause my week has been horrible and i really need to see him. i neeed to be with him i neeed to hug him and kiss him and cuddle with him.i just neeed to see him. even sunday will be fine i just really need to see him. we have gone through some stuff this week and i just neeed to see him. im gonna show him this hehe. so hopefully i can see him. geeeze i like him soooo freakin much. and he is sooo freakin sweet. i miss him hehe. anyways im gonna go and mess around on the net cause im bored. i think im goin to try andleave eaelry tommorow from school cause i wont be doin anything really. talk to u guys later.
so im at school bored out of my mind and finished with my project.woohoo! so im not number one anymore onbrians top 8 im like number 5 now and it makes me sad :( oh well i guess i met a chik that knows lexxi and hates her haha and she knows brian. and says all this stuff like lexxi lies to brian and all that what not but i dunno. last night i was all woried and crying cause im just scared me and him are never goin to ever get to actually date and it makes me sad :( cause i like him oh soo much. but im goin to go and ill be back tommorow.
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devilskategurl's journal
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